Coping style

Theory

Fr_Paul_Edwards spends a lot of time counseling individuals, couples, and groups. Counseling is his gift from the Lord. He has developed an internal dialog you can have with yourself to help you change the way you cope with stuff and help you learn the difference between thinking with the mind in your head and thinking with the mind in your heart.

Take an issue that disturbs you. It could be a relationship or an event. Past, present, or future. As you think of the situation, Talk to yourself. Speak the truth in your own words....

Step 1. "When I think of [ the situation ], I feel [ angry | guilty | depressed | worried | ...]".

Step 2. "When I think of [ the situation ], some times I feel more [ angry | guilty | depressed | worried | ...] than at other times".

Step 3. "When I think of [ the situation ], the mood I am in makes a difference". If this is true, the event cannot be causing your hurt. If it were, you would feel the same pain every time. The pain must be coming from your perspective; from the way you are thinking.

Step 4. "When I think of [ the situation ], I do not HAVE to feel hurt EVERY TIME".

Step 5. "When I think of [ the situation ], it would be POSSIBLE to be in God's peace". Hold that thought until it becomes a reality for you.

So the way you cope with hurt can be from the mind in your head, or the mind in your heart. If you cope from the mind in your heart, wrapped in God's Peace, you will see [ the situation ] quite differently. Remember bipolar disorder? I did not make this up. Scripture tells me that some of us have two minds (actually the word is two-souls). Imagine two separate people inside you - that may not even *like* each other - all the time arguing and disagreeing with each other...

The good news is that the Lord has offered to crucify the you that is fragile and selfish and miserable and unloved and easily hurt. All you have to do is ask... The new you is full of Love, Joy, and Peace.

Practice

Get in the presence of God. Open your spirit to Him. Cast yourself on His Mercy. Offer your old self to Him for crucifixion. Wait for His answer. Keep waiting until He answers you. If you journal, write it down.